My rating: 3.8 of 5 stars
It started out very fun. I had great expectations, it just fell a little short.
So, Liv. Poor lady didn’t have the best of luck in the sex department. First try – guy ends up in the hospital with severe latex allergy. Second try – guy ends up dead on top of her. Yikes! Add to that her being raised in the funeral home and you see how she could be not the most dateable person in town. Also she’s a coroner, so yeah.
If you had to put my love life into a genre, it would probably be horror. By the same token, I’m not even sure that the master of scary shit, Stephen King, could adequately express it on paper.
I would be very cautious if I was her. And she was too, I mean she had like 6 years between every sexcapade. Poor poor girl. It’s no wonder she was ready to get a squeeze of anyone she found on her sex prawl.
Anyway, being out of practice doesn’t mean you should stay uninformed in all things sex.
“How in the world does one have sex with two dicks?”
Didn’t she watch porn like normal people do? And don’t give me that nonsense that not everyone does it. Puhlease!
But I’m getting ahead of myself. She’s not having sex with the guy who has two dicks, we’ll leave that for another genre alltogether. No, our girl ends up finding a candy in a shitstore. Aka Catcher Mains, aka Mr.Drop-dead-sexy, aka dirty mouth. And they hit it off right away.
And in that bright and shining moment, my poor, male-neglected vagina, wich for so long had been flat lining on life-support, coughed and sputtered back to life.
The one night stand with him turns into a joined investigation of murder of the said guy with two dicks. Naturally Catcher is the FBI agent that gets asigned to the case. The case itself is something out of this world weird, with nudist colony (sorry, resort), snake pastors and old witches.
Of course our Agent Mains doesn’t want to end things with Liv with just one night stand and talks her into giving them a shot at dating for reals. That inspires groping and some sexy action in the crime scenes and lots of dirty talk. Sometimes it got a little out of hand.
“Would you like a paddle to help you up Shit Creek in your douchecanoe?”
Exactly my reaction to some of his speeches.
But, seeing as he was practically perfect in all other areas, our girl gave him a break on that one and even learned to love his dirty talk. If I had someone eating cupcakes off of my body, I’d be pretty forgiving myself. Oh man, I will never look at cupcakes the same way again.
The story was tied up with a pretty little bow and I don’t think there should be a continuation, never mind the series. It was good as it was.
Over and out.